Mike's Struggle

The Story From A Broken Mind

First post of 2013, and its about Ativan (Lorazepam) [Journal post 1.1.13]

I have a love/hate thing going with my Ativan today.

After taking about three months worth last night, or about 135mgs (.5mg x3 a day x 30)

My love for it is this, I did not wake up at midnight when all the drunk idiots (who are celebration the beginning of another year of the same crapy shit) around my apartment set off fire work/ banged crap to make noise / just plan making idiots of themselves outside at midnight.

My hate for it is, that I first I woke up and second I woke up at 8am on the 1st. I at the  minimum wanted to be knocked out till the 2nd so that I did not have to spend the day trying to fill the day with stuff.

I so badly hate the holiday I really do.

Thanksgiving & Christmas reminds me that I have no family / that I am alone and unlovable.

New Years reminds me that I am alone and unlovable.

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This entry was posted on January 1, 2013 by in Journal and tagged , , , , , , , .
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